On the start of this new year the word perspective floats in my mind, bumping like a pinball off the multiple scars and resonating on memories nestled in my neurological archives. We are programmed to consider what was and what will be at this time of the year. So I question; Am I a different person leaving 2008 than I was when I got here? Fundamentally no.
I’ve always been surprised at the ongoing realization that I am intrinsically the same person that I was on the first day of Kindergarten. Although my inputs have changed, I continue to process the information using the same hardware… perhaps with a few upgrades to my operating system and increased memory. I reflect, consider and over-evaluate just as I did when I left home for Mrs. Hamilton’s morning class at Washington Elementary School. And while MS has kept me from reasonable upgrades in RAM, I work with what I have and reinvent the how-to of life in creative ways. It is this process helps me to avoid the lethargy of my overextended hard drive.
And so, here I sit with that perspective.
The place that it takes me is one of reflection- that of New Year’s Eves past that mark the decades. Moving from the 80s and 90s into the four-digit years with more than the Y2K fears that most were preoccupied with. What was monumental at that time is silly in retrospect. The more dramatic events of those two decades in my individual experience I’ve shelved as something that shaped my character and helped me to evolve in ways that I wouldn’t have otherwise known. Traversing these decades with a remarkable speed disguised by an uncertain step.
Its funny how perspective prior to writing this entry had me up at 3:30am wondering how we will afford the life we lead and how will I achieve the goals I’ve set before me.
I enter 2009 looking for an external hard drive, an arm to hang on. One that will not only help me to operate with confidence, but will also stabilize my emotional fortitude to live through the challenges that lay ahead with a tech savvy that I can be proud of. Maybe a little Tetris will distract from the “bugs” waking me in the middle of the 364 nights to come .
Lets see what happens, shall we?